A Man Sees Red
1 Something is wrong. Something is not as usual. But nobody wants to notice. Everybody beats about the bush. Just as in the case of the so-called "family drama," which is supposed to be fateful, higher powers seem to direct this fateful election. There is but one tiny difference: In a private family drama (in Turkish: honor's murder) he kills her, because she wants to exit. In this political family drama, he wants to kill her because she enters the stage.
2 The ex-husband who cannot live without his wife (rather, who does not want her to live without him) follows the same rule as the ex-chancellor who does not want to concede. In the first case, the motive is "conjugal love," in the latter it is "patriotic love." For now the country needs to be saved not only from a system change, but from something decidedly worse: a sex change.
3 We recognize the typical tyrant as male. He does whatever he wants to do; and it can be lethal to contradict him. In his universe, his law rules, be it in the home or in the chancellery. Our political tyrant poses as the winner of the election, although he has lost it. In 2005, his female challenger received 450,000 votes more than he did - in 2002, just the trifle of 6000 votes were enough for him to feel confirmed as chancellor. And no one disputed his victory then.
4 But a tyrant sees things differently. He transformed the numerical defeat into a felt victory and behaved so drunk with power on election night as if he had won the absolute majority. After seven years in power, it seems inconceivable for the Cohiba-chancellor to cede his position for someone else. Because "no one but me is able to guarantee a stable government! No one but me!" Days later, his paladin Müntefering still declares "Gerhard Schröder remains chancellor!" And his entire political clan applauds. For this is the logic of such closed systems: the tyrant makes the law. The system has only one weakness: No one dares to obstruct his way. Not even if it is the wrong way. Thus the whole party of the SPD plays a part in the surreal scenarios of the tyrant.
5 Plan Number One: My impertinence will succeed because a) it always used to do, and b) shows are more important than realities in a media democracy. Plan Number Two: I will find an agreement with the real men of the FDP. Plan Number Three: Okay, I will make way for the big coalition and a CDU-chancellor, because I myself feel that my position is untenable - but then I will take her with me. If I fall, then she has to fall as well. Because, after all, it is out of question, hahaha, that a man like me could be replaced by a woman.